I posted this picture at the end of last year when I’d just got back from a 2-week trip to Shanghai, China. I was severely jetlagged, sitting in a conference room in London, in that strange stage of trying again to comprehend the fact I was back, back on UK and Western soil. My brain was not functioning in the full Rachel dimension of living at 5,000 miles an hour, taking the world head on, breathing each moment with those around me, creating and making things happen. I’ve always been known for my inability to sit still. Too much of the world to see and experience with amazing people and unexpected unknowns at every step…appreciating every step.
Periodically since then, this is what my head and space, my “third head-space”, has been like…I’ve been somewhat distracted, partially lost in world of whimsical thought due things, largely stuff I have to deal with on a daily basis, that are out of my control. I’m negotiating what I’d call Rachel’s “third head-space” (I actually speak about “third space” in my PhD in relation to theories of hybridity by Homi K. Bhabha…anyway is that relevant here?)…where I am seen to daydream for hours, with unnecessary physical interludes, presenting dramatic emotional trepidation…as ever, it fuels me, pushing me to work harder. Getting lost in my “third head-space” is to get lost in productivity somehow. Good you might think, but in my current phase of life, Rachel actually needs to “be kind to herself”, prioritise and for once be less selfless towards work and people and just, well be…be me. I have and always will care so much about the people that are around me, are part of my life, often more than myself, as people and their happiness are truly the only important thing in this world. That and health obviously.
So once this intensely busy working week is over in Birmingham-London-Manchester-Manchester-Birmingham-Stafford, it’s time to go into my “third head-space” and have a wander round. It’s time to take the technicians in to give it a refurb, a shift around, a renegotiation. It’s time to take down that picture that’s been on the wall for too long, to tidy away the screwed up pieces of paper on the floor that have unfinished sentences written on them, to water the plants that are pathetically wilting in the winter sun, to take a good look at the view from the windows and realise what’s there.
I have some pretty big fish to fry at the moment, whale-sized health fish that wouldn’t even fit in your local chippy’s deep fat fryer. It’s time to regain Rachel’s “third head-space” so that it is open for business as a “living” room of solace but for one person only. It’s funny how one of the only word I can read in the image below is “between”. If you feel between at the moment, take a moment in your “third head-space” to see what’s going on in there. You never know what might find…